As Chris Peterson once said, other people matter. Period. It has been proven that the quality of our relationships can positively influence every aspect of our well-being. In fact, the longest scientific study on happiness (more than 80 years) conducted by Harvard University researchers clearly shows that positive relationships keep us healthier and happier (Waldinger & Schulz, 2023). Science has realized that caring, loving, and respectful relationships are as important for our health and well-being as our diet, exercise, or environment we live in. In this blog, along with the opportunity to reflect on your relationships - you and I will learn more about social skills that will help you to build your high-quality relationships at home, at school, at work, and in your community. We are in this together :-)

 

The profound impact of positive relationships on overall well-being is undeniable (Waldinger & Schulz, 2023). Harvard Study of Adult Development emphasizes the importance of the quality of relationships over quantity and that so-called micro-moments of connection in our daily life matter. It can be very healthy for you to actively create and care for relationships, including the one with yourself. 

 

Micro-Moments of Connections

What are benefits of positive relationships for university and college students?  Let me invite you to learn about the concept of "positivity resonance" and its impact on your well-being.

 

Let’s think for a minute how small interactions contribute to our well-being. We all know well when someone’s bad mood can „jump” on us. But the same can happen with positive experience. What matters is the connection we create with another living being. These so-called micro-moments of connections (Fredrickson, 2014) make us feel well in the long-term. So how do we connect? By shaking someone’s hand in greetings, by hugging a friend when they feel sad, by laughing with a colleague or even by exchanging a genuine smile with a cashier in a local store. 

 

Yes, emotions are very contagious. When someone smiles at you experience body-like reaction, you feel more energized, uplifted, and you also reflexively smile back. Our bodies feel calm when someone dear to us hugs us. And our hearts open when we feel genuinely safe with people in our environment. It does feel good momentary, but sum-up of these micro-moments of connection do much more for us. They make our long-term well-being literally flourish.

 

Would you be interested in improving your relationships?
 

I would love to share with you some tips from my newest book Well-being and Success for University Students (Kočí & Donaldson, 2024) now:

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So, what are the practical steps for building and nurturing positive relationships? We can focus on leveraging our empathy, healthy (not pushed) positivity, and effective communication.

 

We already know that our relationships play critical role in our well-being and quality of life. And I find particularly important to actively cultivate them rather than mere pursuit of them. There are many activities that will help you to support your social health. Those are a gratitude visits, fostering authenticity, collaboration, empathy training, forgiveness, or self-compassion. Good social skills will help you to maintain healthy relationships with your classmates as the unique and valuable relationships formed during school and university. But also, your relationships with teachers, one of our biggest life influencers. 

 

What about relationships with our co-workers? How can we grow those? If you feel comfortable in a role of a team player, you might contribute by effective collaboration in the workplace. If you feel more comfortable working by yourself, you can spread healthy optimism, show effort in understanding team goals, innovate, be reliable, a good communicator, facilitator, or a supporter. And if your work causes you a lot of energy, recharge with your friends. 

 

Nurture friendships through love, care, and respect, but also set and respect boundaries in friendships and in relationships with family members. Empathy and forgiveness can also help you in cultivating strong family bonds. As well as open communication – have you ever tried to use open-ended questions for deeper connections? Start your questions with what, why, when, or where and enjoy your ongoing conversations. 

 

But how can we care for our relationships with our partners and significant others? Show your love with active constructive listening. You will find this skill particularly valuable in strengthening our intimate relationships. Encourage supportive responses to good news to boost your and your partner’s well-being rather than just quite nodding or not showing much of an interest. 

 

We cannot forget about the impact of positive interactions with people in the community. Altruism and selfless help will help you enjoy those. 

 

And let me close this blog with the most significant relationship of all. Relationship with oneself. Practice self-compassion and authenticity and invest in the relationship with yourself at least as much as you invest in relationships with others, please. 

I would love to invite you to explore my book Well-being and Success for University Students (Kočí & Donaldson, 2024) if you would like to strengthen your social skills!

 

 

References:

Kočí, J. (2024). Building Well-being of University Students. Praha: Univerzita Karlova, Pedagogická fakulta. ISBN 978-80-7603-506-5.

Fredrickson, B. (2014). Love 2.0: Creating happiness and health in moments of connection.

New York: Plume.

Koci, J. & Donaldson, S. I. (2024). Well-being and Success of University Students: Applying PERMA+4. New York, NY: Routledge. ISBN: 9781032457185; DOI: 10.4324/9781003378365.

Waldinger, R. W., & Schulz, M. S. (2023). The good life: Lessons from the world’s longest

scientific study on happiness. New York: Simon & Schuster.